Initiating vs Responding - What's your Interaction Style?

Are you someone who will start a conversation at a networking event? Or would you prefer for someone else to make the first move? Do you consider yourself outgoing and gregarious? Or would you describe yourself as more introspective?

When we first meet people, we either initiate the interaction or respond to the other person's initiating moves. It is important to know that neither way is better or worse.

Am I more initiating or responding?

Use the information below as a guide to determine your role when interacting with others. This information has been summarised from Linda Beren’s book Understanding Yourself and Others: An Introduction to Interaction Styles.

Initiating

Focus on – the external world
Intent – reach out, interact
Behaviour – initiates interactions, fast pace, extravert and gregarious
Comfort Zone – comfortable making the first move, less comfortable with silence
Examples – think out loud, speak and act quickly, easier to get to know
Tendencies – impatient with a slow pace, surprised when people do not want to talk, want regular feedback and opportunities for interaction
(Berens, 2001)

Responding

Focus on – the internal world
Intent – reach in, reflect
Behaviour – responds and reflects, has a slower pace and is patient, introverted, and solitary.
Comfort Zone – less comfortable making the first move, comfortable with silence
Examples – think before commenting, reflect and try, harder to get to know.
Tendencies – pressured by fast pace, maybe frustrated at lack of time to reflect
(Berens, 2001)

Communication Styles

Our workplace is more diverse than ever, and as such, we interact with and learn about new personalities and communication styles every day. Just as organisations look to adapt to this huge amount of change, we each need to learn how to best communicate with others.

There are now four generations, all working alongside each other. This diversity creates more opportunities and elevates creativity. However, navigating these differences tactfully can often be difficult.

Many factors contribute to what’s known as ‘good communication, including:
•    Our mindset and ‘state’ when communicating
•    Diversity and communication
•    Body language
•    Unconscious bias

All of these factors, each on a spectrum, govern our preferences in how information is delivered. When we learn about communication styles, we notice where our core preferences sit and how we adjust some of our language to remain within a wheelhouse that feels authentic to ourselves.

Similar to having a work self and a home self, those are two circles of the same Venn diagram that overlap but also have unique behaviours.